Kids In The Hall

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Credits
Original Author Erica Bourke and Tavie Phillips (and alt.tv.kids-in-hall)
Original Location http://wwwvms.utexas.edu/~barbcarr/drink.html (no longer exists)

Dave

Take a sip if:

  • Dave plays an English mum.
  • You see Dave with a mug of coffee.
  • Dave takes a sip of coffee.
  • Dave mentions asses.
  • Dave plays a bastard.
  • Dave makes a reference you don't understand.
  • Dave is covered in blood.

Three sips if:

  • You see blond Dave.
  • You see prostitute Dave.

Chug for:

  • Butt shot of Dave!

Bruce

Take a sip if:

  • Bruce does the tongue thing. (You know what I'm talking about.)
  • The dog with whom Bruce connects shows up.
  • Bruce is wearing a moustache.

Three sips for:

  • A Bruce short film.
  • Blond Bruce.
  • Demure female Bruce. (A toughie; she shows up a lot.)

Chug for:

  • Bruce with fake breasts. (He claims never to have worn them, but it's still fun to look for!)

Kevin

Take a sip if:

  • Kevin does that thing with his arms where he crosses them and uncrosses them vehemently to make a point.
  • You see Kevin with a cup of tea.
  • Kevin takes a sip of tea.
  • Kevin has a monologue.
  • Kevin's butt is shown.
  • Kevin's voice reaches an unnatural pitch.
  • Kevin puts himself down. (Also, I suggest blowing kisses of sympathy to him.)
  • You see Kevin's back hair.

Three sips if:

  • You see "The Kevin Face" (as described by Liz, "Hands clasped in prayer on the chin, and wide eyes...")
  • You see red-haired Kevin.

Mark

Take a sip if:

  • Mark has a monologue.
  • Mark makes a reference to farm animals.
  • Every time Melanie smiles and her braces glisten and sparkle in a scene.
  • Every time someone mispronounces Darrill's name.

Three sips for:

  • Every time Darrill corrects the person who mispronounces his name.
  • Every time the Chicken Lady gets excited and explodes if you know what I mean.
  • Mark with an accent. (Another toughie. Get someone to drive you home.)
  • Mark as himself.
  • Mark screams. (He is the best screamer.)

Scott:

Take a sip if:

  • Scott says "Jesus".
  • Scott says "faggot".
  • A reference is made to the length of Scott's monologues.
  • Scott makes a reference you don't understand.
  • Buddy Cole shows up.
  • Scott plays a child.

Three sips for:

  • Blond Scott.
  • Prostitute Scott.

All of the Kids

Take a sip if:

  • You hear the name "Tony".
  • Anyone says "bastard".
  • They kiss or hug each other.
  • Take a swig when they mention movies they've been in.
  • Satan is mentioned.
  • The Kids sing.
  • Drain the glass for the Do-Re-Mi sketch.
  • One of their significant others shows up in a sketch.
  • Something is bleeped out/censored.
  • You hear the word "prick".
  • Drain glass if you hear the word "prick" and it's bleeped out in the same sketch.
  • They portray someone who actually existed. (Elvis, Queen, Charlton Heston, etc.)
  • A guest celebrity shows up.
  • You see real stubble on their faces.
  • Any of them are naked.
  • Swig if anyone (i.e., Kevin) plays a woman without the aid of a wig.
  • They're in a sketch where they play "themselves" and it's NOT a monologue
  • "Gorgonchuck" is mentioned.
  • Drain the glass if anyone BESIDES Dave or Scott make a reference you don't understand.
  • Someone says something in French.
  • You can actually translate something they said in French.
  • Someone makes a Toronto reference.
  • Someone says "FREAK".
  • You see your favorite character.
  • They play an unflattering American.
  • Chug for Stinky Pink!
  • Chug when your favorite sketch shows up. (If every sketch is your absolute favorite, get someone to drive you home.)
  • Sip if you spot a continuity error. (Level of drinks, etc.)

Non-Kids characters

Take a sip if:

  • The Do-Re-Mi Kid shows up.
  • A guest celebrity shows up.
  • You see Bellini.
  • Swig if Bellini isn't wearing the towel.
  • You see Bingo.
  • Drain if Bingo is naked.
  • You hear the "Bellini theme".
  • Swig if you hear the "Bellini theme" and Bellini isn't in the sketch.
  • You see Jeff Berman!
  • Murray shows up.
  • The "It's a Fact" Girl shows up.
  • Chug if Mark IS the Fact Girl.
  • You see the 30 Helens.
  • They don't label a Helen.
  • You see the anal probed guy (Luc Casimiri)