Scott Hamilton

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Another gem submitted by Trudi Marrapodi

You know the ground rules. Belly up to the bar and name your poison. Turn the boob tube to CBS skating coverage (or pop in a tape), pick a skater in the event, and drink according to these rules: bullet Whenever Scott praises "your" skater effusively after mentioning even the slightest criticism, take a sip. bullet If you chose Oksana Baiul, take a sip every time Scott talks about how incomparable she is to every other skater.

Everyone has to drink every time Scott utters the following phrases (on old tapes or new broadcasts):

  • "And she/he NAILS it!"
  • "The only mark that beats a 5.9 is a 6.0."
  • "What they do, they do very, very well."
  • "That's his/her money jump."
  • "He/she *just* couldn't hang onto the landing."
  • "I know she/he wants that jump back."
  • "He/she's gotta be happy with that program."
  • "Five or six major flaws, but otherwise an excellent, *excellent* program in anyone's book."
  • "Ask any skater what's the hardest jump in skating, and they'll tell you--it's the one right after a fall."
  • "Skates only like to go in two directions: forwards and backwards. They don't like to go sideways."
  • "Anytime Brian Boitano skates, the judges feel safe putting him in first place."
  • "They have so many wonderful qualities."

And, when Scott says...

  • "Anything less than a 6.0 is too low a mark to give Oksana Baiul"...